food and other things

we accidently set course for san juan del sur due to a financial situation.
during travel and confusion i forgot it was my bday. after confirmation we splurged at the bakery and ate large quantities of cookies.
we gota hella´cheap/rad hotel (shown below) and we´re dippin´in 2 days for san jose to meet up with mat again.

we´re back / this is going to be hard to swallow

a lot has happened in recent days, so i am going to make this snappy...

we are currently situated on that island in the center of the map, isla de ometepe (there are turantulas here!). it´s really f-ing cool, but we didnt bring any money and there´s no ATM so we´re breakn´for costa rica real soon. this island´s got 2 active volcanoes, one of which we climbed yestuday.
there´s a good story behind this but perhaps i will save the extended version for a next post. basically we were way up in a cloud forest with monkeys, knee high in mud. we chilled in the volcano hole with some austrians and had a stretching party in our underwear. anyway..

prior to this we spent two days in grenada with mat. he comped most of our food and drink on his tour company. colin bought a foot long burrito and i bought a white t-shirt and a single one-time-use pack of head and shoulders for $2.25. mat also bought a burrito but fed the whole thing to a dog. his hotel was pimped and i got to use skype with jake for the first time.

the mission to the island was a 3 hour boat ride on the fresh water/shark inhabited lake nicaragua. here, we bought ´second´class tickets to ride along with the working class. 100´s of people packed into the lower deck of the boat. it was like that scene from titanic where kate winslet goes down into the basement with jack and parties for a night with the poor people and has a lot of fun doing it. but in our case there were more nicaraguans and the travelling circus was there. seriously. accordian, balancing acts and acrobatics. it got annoying after awhile because they sucked at what they did.

upon arrival we hitched a ride with 3 unrelated americans. one´s claim to fame was his roll in teenage mutant ninja turtles as a footclan extra. im going to rent this when i get home.

another one was this 75 year old firecracker from boston, henry. he had been travelling by himself with a broken rib and a missing toe cut off by the italians in the 40´s. he was a compelling man with lots to say.

we dined and drank with these three, which led to a lot of tomfoolery. i had to walk henry back to his farmacy-hotel at the end of the night. he was banging on the door, ¨let me in you motha fuckers!¨ he yells in his boston accent. the woman inside sounded abit worried. fastforward, she pointed to the side gate. henry, stumbling into just about everything falls into a ditch and loses a shoe. ¨im going to knock you out when i get in there!¨ of course the woman has no idea what he´s saying and im trying to cool everyone down in broken spanish... you get the idea.

___________________________________

so that was that. but.. news from the frontline.
we hate work´s darkest hour is afoot. the end of the line.
one plane ticket has been purched for early february. someone´s comin´home in the middle of the storm. i dont got the details.

see you next time.
- juan

the wildlife

wesley snipes

RETIRED

fourty-one beds later

moving on to grenada this morning to meet up with mat.
but more importantly, australia open began 2 days ago.
viva rafael nadal!
this guy is my hero.. along with jaimi oliver and Dick Proenneke from alone in the wilderness. check that out.

ok, good.

yay. departed leon to masaya last afternoon. i think colin had a rough travel day again for unknown reasons...

hopefully spontaneity picks up again.

____________________

¨wear comfortable shoes on inaugural day¨
- cnn

uncle binny

jon and colin would like to announce that they second bin laden´s call for a jihad against the israeli aggresion.

thats all for today.

una vida ocupada

so, as you can see, me and jon are getting pretty occupied these days..seriously, we try to do stuff sometimes.
Last night we attended a rock concert. I had seen flyers around town and they had skeletons, so i figured that was a good sign. We showed up relatively early to acoustic music and a room full of older Nicas. We stayed cause litre beers were 2 dollas.
Next, another guy came with more acoustic. He really liked singing songs about Nicaragua or god. Or how Nicaragua was good cause god made it.....yep.
Um, finally a ´rock´group came on. They warmed up playing metal solos ( i think dragonforce would kill it down here)....and there first song was rock..whoo. we found it.
but then the rest of their set was covers...particularly awesome covers>!
in this order....3 doors down, u2, acdc(badly), the doors (amaZING), and of course ending of with the rockinest of all rockers....bon jovi (that song where they go whoaaaa alot)...dope.

anyways, we left early.

after that jon bought pizza off of a girl who wanted to kill him.
you see...mostly people are cool when we interact with them...they are either nice, laugh at us, or dont understand us...or all three.
but a certain amount appear to be absolutey disgusted with us...they just arent having us...and i dont really know why...we´re pretty normal people. i think.

jon- how much is a piece of pizza?
girl starts taking the pizza out to give to him (of course with a hateful look)
then starts to get a bag
jon-no bag please
girls puts the slice in the bag and ties it a lil extra tight

she probably just hates work. so its all good.

real tourists

my adventurous spirit is deteriorating here in leon. it´s 38 degrees and the shower is broke. my matress´s capacity to retain sweat is showing through the underside. i have little reason to leave the house. i eat cookies and icecream for breakfast and dinner. the internet only brings bad news from hamas. sirens wake me in the morning. and mosquitos and owls wake me at night.

at any rate, here are some photos from our day entitled, ¨lets try to be real tourists.¨
we went to a sad, sorry and poorly maintained ´legends´museum, which by the look of it hadn´t seen a tourist since the time of its creation. afterwards, we hung out in between the decayed walls of a historic monument, which doubled as a garbage dump/hobo hide-out. finally, we headed over to a really big church that was closed for the day.
all-in-all we wanted to see some things and do some stuff but failed.

so, without further a due, this is that.

- juan

rainbows, promises, new beginnings

apparently today is the 3 month anniversary...thats what jon tells me anyways
so i felt the obligation to blog..
things are relatively slow down here, we are basically living between meals...which is pretty nice.

At night, usually a few drinks to get to sleep....its pretty hard...i sleep with no covers and almost no clothes, and still im am actualy sweating the majority of the night...meanwhile, mosquitoes are fucking raping my exposed skin while i am helpless. Needless to say sleeping isnt my favourite part of the day.

i hung out with a shoe shiner in the park yesterday. in a cruel act of fate, he was working as a shoe shiner so that he could buy shoes (he had none). he told me that he likes white girls cause they have large breasts and that he listens to christian reggae (?)....also that he attends university for natural science, i think maybe the no shoes thing would be a problem...


anyways, keep hating work, say yes to life, live like a stray dog.

people certainly don´t go on vacation to relax

___________________________________--

we are living in leon and not much is going on.
i´ve been spending the majority of my days in a rocking chair, thinking about lunch and dinner options. im reading mason´s, a history of the sciences, and bukowski´s, dangling in the tournefortia. did you know galileo measured the elevation of the mountains on the moon by looking at their shadows through a telescope he built himself?? isnt that interesting?

last night a drunk homeless man tried reaching into our pockets for change. we let this happen for fun, but it wasnt that, so we left.

this morning i told a child i didn´t speak english in spanish, but he didnt believe me.

so really, that´s what´s goin´ on.

interview with juan

Interview Part Two:

Its time to meet the other half of this dynamic duo, Jon (aka Juan) Lee.
Jon is not just our trip photographer but also has many fascinating thoughts and ideas. Lets see what he has to say.


1) Jon, I´ve noticed you take a lot of naps. I´m wondering if you can explain the importance of this, maybe tell us what kinds of special powers this gives you.
naps are definitely an important part of my daily regiment -namely for the purpose of averting the displeasures of everyday life!

2) You´ve been known to befriend dogs and name them things like Steely Dan or Wesley Snipes. Can you talk about your canine connection. How do you come up with those names?
yes, i have made a number of long lasting and meaningful relationships with dogs in the past. they like me because i keep sausages in my pockets. and they usually whisper their names to me late in the evening.

actually, i remember wesley snipes sleeping under me and having that tax evading look to him. that´s where he got his name.

3) We all know your a bit of a food conniseur. Central America and food. What have you got to say?
i like to compare central american food with thanksgiving. blend it all up and it still tastes the same!

4) What would you rather ride, a horse or a packed Guatemalan shuttle van?
i fear horses. next question.

5) How has Henry Chinaski changed your life?
i know you know, but for the reader i will try to explain. this man has influenced the way we speak. for example, when inquiring about going for a drink, we say, ¨chinaski?¨

6) Can you explain to our readers the t-shirt rotation program?
wear it till it stinks no longer. the life cycle of shirt goes from clean to stinky and back to clean again. it´s a phenomena i can´t explain.

7) What would the world be like without hats?
a puffy hair populous of baseball haters.

8) Name three songs you never want to hear again.
anything by bob marley, summer of 69´ by brian adams, and save a horse ride a cowboy by big and rich.

9) Leo Tolstoy or Leo Dicaprio?
i really enjoy being swept away to 19th century rural russia, but dicaprio stole my heart in growing pains the television series. im going dicaprio because i´v known him a bit longer.

10) What have you learned about religious celebrations in your time down here?
that´s easy. one word: fireworks.

Parting words en español?
no hablar a las personas no te gusta.

pork

spent a few days on the coast. it was really hot and i saw a pig on the beach.
________________________________

a few days back on one particularly hot day, colin and myself went out for some strawberry milkshakes. after a long discussion with the shop owner, we were offered a place to stay in the back for 25$ (15 nights). we accepted and now we´re hanging out for 2 weeks.

¨i am impartial to this happening.¨

mathieu roy

i would like to introduce everyone to mathieu roy. we met in jasper, alberta during the summer of 07´ and till this day remains a good friend of mine. for the last half year or so he´s been living in san jose, costa rica with his girlfriend gabriella. he works as a tour guide and for the next month he will be showing some french people around the country.

for me, it is my top priority to meet up with this man, as he is the world´s friendliest asshole.

mucho amo mi amigo,
see you soon.
- juan

cut short

holy shit. its 2009.

omg 2009. who cares?
we spent our new years eve in a posh area of San Salvador, El Salvador.
there was a huge mall and an overabundance of burger kings...we decided to live large and get a private room with a tv! holla.

on the last night of 2008, we didnt really know what to do. i got a bottle of smirnoff for 5 dollars.
our back up plan was to go to some bar down the street..which we did but of course it was closed.
so we drunkingly wandered around for a long time and everything was closed....i guess we were in the wrong area?
eventually we found an establishment that was open. it was BOOMING.
there were almost 15 people in there!..also by the tiime we arrived new years had already passed without our knowledge. but whatever, they had cold cervezas.
there was also maybe..i dont know, 2 womyn in there?
so of course we had a little dance party...all four of us, in a empty bar with a little audience.
luckily i got the good looking girl as my dance partner...she was a good dancer.
Jon had to take one for the team and dance with the less attractive female, and she wasnt a very good dancer (and she had missing teeth).
thats about all i remember.
celebrated new years day with terrible fast food and saw the new kenau reeves movie! wow.

we just arrived in Managua, Nicaragua today. so far it sucks ( not nicaragua, just managua)...i think its just cause were in a kinda sketchy neighbourhood....

mucho tiempo con nada hacer

i'v had a lot of time to myself in these parts. days filled with eating, reading, surfing/swimming, eating, napping, interneting and repeating. i'v learned how to sew and code html in the last few days, so here's the fruit of my labour. be bedazzled by the new look of our blog!

tomorrow we will try our luck at celebrating new years in san salvidor (capital city), homicide capital of the world (15-24 years of age). lucky for me, im turning 25. that's too bad for colin. not to worry brenda, we will be staying in the poshest district of them all, boulevard de los heroes. there will be malls and muchas fresas (wealthy latino girls).

interview with colin

colin and i aren't just two pretty faces, you know; we have really neat personalities too! it is now time to meet the creators through a series of interview questions conducted by juan (me), and answered by mr. blacoe.


interview below..










1. why do you like the middle east so much?

Well Juan, firstly the food. I'm a bit of a falafel addict..hummus too...chick peas in general
And I've also been turning into a bit of history nerd in the last year...and they've got quite a large history n those parts.
Finally, the west versus east conflict (however misconstrued it is), is sure to be one of the main driving forces in contemporary world politics and conservative propaganda.

2. if you could only eat food of one colour, which would it be?

Wow, thats even harder than the last question......I would prolly go with green...its ALL about the green.

3. what should american football really be called?

Who really cares? Football sucks...we all know that, right?

4. who killed the electric car?

I forget how that movie ends.....the vietcong?...right?

5. who's got the best haircut of all time?

Probably a tie between your drivers license picture and Nick Rivera's helmet circa 1999

6. best run country of 2008?

I dont know man!..they're all terrible....I like what the greeks are doing with themselves right now!

7. first thing that comes to mind:

1997 - high school, skateboarding, so cal punk rock
guatamala > tortillas, garbage, mountains, coffee
'gasolina' (the song) > me dancing to shitty music in latin america
mexico > hot as fuck, good food, better buses than Canadia
alcatraz > didnt nick cage escape from there?,....i saw it!

8. where are you in 2 days, 2 months, 2 years

chillin in latin america or playing music and smoking dank in Toronto

9. fourth last and first ever book read?

First ever book read? who can remember that?....I remember reading a book when i was really young called 'the rookie', about a baseball player...
fourth last?...um.....i know it was by Pramoedenya Toer


10. who can conjure more wizardry power:
christian slater or john travolta?

This is obvious! Travolta!..hes a scientologist...that means he has all of science on his side!
However...scientists usually dont believe in wizardy...they want things like 'proof' and 'evidence'
sooo. im gonna have to go with slater...im pretty sure all his power is in his eyebrows

otra dia en el peligroso

colin almost got spearheaded by a testy free range bull today.

blame it on the cities

uninspired note on the last 4 days -

travel time >>>
lanquin to coban. coban to guatamala city.
observations >>>
GC is ugly. our hotel creepy. infinite exhaust and markets. colin unintentionally ate eggs and beans 4 meals in a row. i ate a salad at burger king. popped our heads in a mall for xmas-sakes - bad!

travel >>>
cross boarder to san salvadore, el salvadore - ZZzzZZzzz
observations >>>
easy boarder crossing. ripped off on exchange. man with shotgun guarding our hotel. mass food for 2$. cheap beers. prostitution offers. fireworks from 12 till 1am.

travel >>>
SS to la libertad (back to the pacific coast - *la mar)
observations >>>
hot. unusual skatepark. football fight. helped push a truck.

travel >>>
LL to sunzal beach.
observations >>>
finally, a place to rest our heads. great hostel, surf and food. we suck at surfing.

------------------------------------
* "he always thought of the sea as 'la mar' which is what people call her in spanish when they love her. sometimes those who love her say bad things of her but they are always said as though she were a woman."
- Hemingway